Prologue

Even numbered years have always been good for me; I graduated on an even year, learned to drive on an even year, my brother is getting married on an even day of an even month of an even year, etc. So I am going into 2010 with high hopes and unique quest: to stay out of any serious, committed, exclusive, or involved relationship for the entire calendar year. Few would imagine this to be a challenge worth documenting, but as a recently self diagnosed, love sick, chronic serial dater, the events of the coming year could be interesting and certainly should be entertaining, and will be the singular purpose of what is written here. I intend for the next three hundred and sixty five days to be a time of philosophical introspection and personal growth, not simply chasing indiscriminate women. At least not entirely. I want to leave behind my unabashed poondoggery in favor of a more cultivated and sophisticated taste. Unless she’s hot or Native American or something kinda cool and exotic like that.

What follows is the collection of the Misadventures of the willfully single narrator, Thaddeus, and his close friend, token sidekick, sometimes caddy, and constant wingman Young Lad. Like the two main characters, anyone included in the stories here will be given appropriate pseudonyms to mask their identity for their own innocence (or lack thereof). Destinations and locations will be intentionally obfuscated and many pertinent details will be intentionally omitted or preemptively forgotten due to the influence of alcohol. Also, I am allowing myself some degree of poetic license to keep things entertaining and anonymous. The spirit of this public journal is entirely in jest and hopefully uplifting, and so in that spirit, I implore anyone commenting here keep to my same standards of anonymity and show just a little decorum. Of course I do expect people to uncover their secret identities and take some offense to what is written here, and I apologize now in advance and probably never will again.